If You're Interested

I recently tried my hand at writing an op-ed piece and submitted it to several newspapers. Only the local paper picked it up. The Springville Herald put it on pg. 2, and it's parent company The Daily Herald put it on their website. Here's the link:

"Maybe I Can Live with Obama"

I'd love any feedback.

The New Bathroom

Here are some photos from the bathroom remodel - beginning to end.

This is the only photo I can find where you can see the bathroom before construction. Oddly enough we don't take very many photos of our bathrooms. We'll have to work on that. (You'll notice Jarom's handy work.)

This is the old window. If you showered water would get on the outside of the window and drip down the side of the house. It was awesome. So if you couldn't tell someone was showering by the fuzzy, nude silhouette, than you could just look for the watermark spreading beneath the window.

Notice all the insulation in the wall? There it is between the studs. I think it's R-.00001.

Here's the view from the outside. You will just have to imagine the fuzzy, nude silhouette and the dripping water. So sad for you.

This is what the toilet drain used to look like. If you've never worked with cast iron drain pipe than you haven't lived. There is only two ways to cut it: 400 hacksaw blades and 2,000 man hours or a special chain that cinches around the pipe. In the chain are these cutting discs that cut into the pipe as you cinch down the chain. Eventually the pipes just breaks. The chain takes about 15 to 30 min. Here I had just finished installing the moldings and trim.

And here is the finished product.

This linen closet used to be a stack of drawers and cupboards circa 1966.

If you need any work done, I need work. So, give me a call and send me some traveling expenses and I'm there. Oh, and I'll need room and board.

Is it Us or the Public Schools?

You should all get a kick out of this. Recently our daughter Andrea received one of those crackpot emails where someone is unveiling some grand conspiracy. Well, this one related to the new Presidential dollar coins. The email claims that "In God We Trust" has been removed from the coin, and that we all need to band together with torches and pitch forks and head for D.C. and demand the gov fix this injustice immediately (or maybe you're supposed to 'sign' an email petition). Now, I would agree (except for the torches which emit CO2, which would hasten the melting of the ice caps, and the raising of the seas and all manner of hell breaking loose) if only the claim were true. Unfortunately for the claimant "In God We Trust" IS on the coin, just on the edge. I pointed this out to Andrea, which she passed on to her friend(s) in a reply. Keep in mind, I only dealt with the religious issue. There is, however, something else on the edge of the coin. Here is Andrea's reply (pardon the teenage email grammer):

"that coin in God we trust email is a lie it does say in God we trust right here i'm not kidding it does look and see for your self it also even says it in spanish"

Oh boy......

The 'W' Must Stand for Woodenhead or Witless

Thought you might get a kick out of this. For all his positives in his handling of the war on terror, this may overshadow it all. It's possible his legacy will be 'Economic Moron'. It's Herbert Hoover followed by FDR all over again. Wow, are these people smart!

Why Men Should Not Blog

Marie just pointed out to me that in my "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" post I left out all the other October birthdays. Well, I say, Marie left out all the other birthdays. Blogging should not be left for a man to do. I thought I was doing pretty well remembering that I had a mother, brother, and sister. Remembering that they had birthdays in October was just a testament to my blinding awesomeness. Today my wife says, "Hey, braniac, there are others with October birthdays. Duh!" (I'm paraphrasing.) Well, to her I say, "Try reading my blog more than once every three months!" So for those of you who were left out I offer this humble apology: "Thanks for the timely heads-up, Marie. Way to go."

To make amends I re-offer this new and improved birthday wish:

As for you November and December birthdays, I refer you to the video disclaimer.

Pictures of Grace

The wife requested that I post pictures of Gracie. So here they are. Enjoy.

By the way, as cute as she is in these photos, they pale in comparison to the real thing.

Filet de Oreille

I haven't posted in a while because nothing of any interest has happened here in sometime, unless you count the UFO landing last week in the field behind our house when six of our children were abducted and replaced two days later with robotic clones. But who hasn't had that happen. So I finally have something mildly interesting to share, plus it includes a photo. Admittedly, it's not as good as the foot in the brain photo, but it is ours. 

Yesterday Jarom was doing one of his usual stunts where he puts his left hand on the sofa, his right hand on the coffee table/cedar chest and swings himself forward.  Well, yesterday his right hand slipped. Hence Filet de Oreille ('ear' for you non-Frenchies).

So, I took him to the ER where, amazingly, we did not have to wait. Apparently filleted body parts are like a backstage pass, because you get right in. Back in Arizona when I had pneumonia and a 105º temp, they just sent me to the lobby: "Sorry, sir. Potential brain damage is of little concern. We've got a kid here who filleted his finger. Have you ever seen one of those. It's awesome." Apparently all the medical personnel on the other side of the double doors, that get slammed open by the gurney in the TV shows, take a vote on which case they'll see next:

"Okay, people. We've got a woman with cramps, an old man with a broken ankle, an old woman with kidney stones, a kid with a jungle-gym induced bump on the head who's blood pressure is 60 over 20, a guy with a 112º temperature and blood oozing out his ears, or a guy with a filleted right index finger."

"Can you see bone and stuff on the finger one?"

"Yes. It's totally gross....Okay, so how many want the crampy woman?...Okay, none. How many for the busted ankle...apparently he twisted it in the sand?...Okay, none.... Awe, who am I kidding. Who wants to see the gross looking finger?....Okay, that's 10, 11, 12....23. Okay, the finger it is!"

Anyway, the doctor was impressed that Jarom was the seventh child of eight so he worked seven stitches into the deal. What a guy! He probably charges by the stitch.

"Uh, doctor? Why does he have 138 stitches? It's only a busted lip."

"You can never be too careful with these things. That's why I'm the doctor and you're just a nurse."

Anyway, I was just glad to find out that Jarom is NOT one of the androids.